The collage, "Where Is the Love," is the most personal work in the series. I have chosen texts that reflect my feelings about my mother.
"All The Things You Are"
Angela's notes (undated)
The time I feel closest to her
on Bart morning train to work
iPod headphones loud enough to drown out the rumbling vibrations of the tracks
Ella Fitzgerald All You Are –
The first 2 songs (words) and I’m gone –
I can’t remember her voice anymore but the brassy sound it’s all there in the song’s first two words
it’s Mom and even though I open my eyes briefly, the jarring sight of placid, occupied faces, sitting, reading their newspaper, brightly lit interior of the train rushing through the East Bay tunnel and I shut my eyes to stay with Ella, with Mom, if only for 2 minutes or so I’m with her again. I’m too scared to sleep alone when CJ and Jake aren’t around. Scared in some way that she’ll visit me as a ghost – but I surround myself with her things as some kind of talisman telling her Mom don’t come to scare me, you’re here already – but I miss the voice and presence
was she if she wasn’t around too much, she already was in me – and I can’t remember her voice anymore but it comes back to me in just two words as Ella sings the notes begins the song with the soft caress – You Are… And I’m crying… Someday My Happy Arms Will Hold You